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108

It’s possible to feel life as a sickness in the stomach, the very existence of one’s soul as a muscular discomfort. Desolation of spirit, when sharply felt, stirs distant tides in the body, where it suffers pain by proxy.

I’m conscious of myself on a day when the pain of being conscious is, as the poet* says,

lassitude, nausea, and agonizing desire.