A Voyage I Never Made (II)

I hide behind the door, so that Reality won’t see me when it enters. I hide under the table, from where I can jump out and give Possibility a scare. Thus I cast off, like the two arms of an embrace, the two huge tediums that squeeze me – the tedium of being able to live only the Real, and the tedium of being able to conceive only the Possible.

In this way I triumph over all reality. You say my triumphs are castles of sand?… And what divine substance constitutes the castles which are not of sand?

How do you know that my kind of voyaging doesn’t rejuvenate me in some obscure way?

Child of absurdity, I relive my early years, playing with ideas of things as with toy soldiers, which in my infant hands did things that went against the very notion of a soldier.

Drunk on errors, for a little while I stray and quit feeling myself live.